Every now and then I say or write things that are pure diamonds of wisdom. Diamonds in the sense that they are extremely condensed bullcrap that seems to sparkle. Or at least, make me laugh. I love it when I can make me laugh. You’ll find these nuggets of awesome in the Ridiculous section of this page.
And then sometimes, I say things in few words that make a whole lot of sense. To me. And I’m sure will be repeated ad nauseum when I take over the role of most quoted mammal from Mark Twain. Eventually these things will become cliches, but I’m cool with that. You’ll find these concentrations of Brian’s brain-juice in the Less Ridiculous section.
I will add to this page as time passes and more hunks of solid knowledge fall from my lips or are tapped out by my fingers. For now, I start this with two gems.
“Lunch time is the right time to overeat.”
This quote inspired this page of my own personal greatness. As is the norm, my wife was giving me hell about eating too much. I replied with this gem with the intent of discussing that eating a large lunch is strategically better than eating a large dinner, diet-wise. I didn’t get that far. It was just too funny. I just kill me.
“It’s car, not a damn phone booth.”
Several years ago on my way to lunch, after several near accidents caused by people yammering on their mobile phones, I was inspired to yell this at one particularly inconsiderate idiot at the wheel. Seriously, what the hell do people have to talk about that can’t wait until they’re parked? That was also the week I noticed that people in Atlanta pop out their cell phones before they even turn the ignition over in their car. What we have here in Atlanta are roads swarming with phone booths of death. This quote is also featured in the comments of Straight From The GodCast: The 10 Commandments Of The Road.
“What we have here in Atlanta are roads swarming with phone booths of death.”
See previous quote.
“If a cigar is meant to be a journey, the Oliva Serie V is an epic road trip full of hedonistic pleasure.”
From the Oliva Serie V Ligero Especial review I contributed to the Cigar Beat blog.
“My philosophy is, if you aren’t be part of the solution, make money off the problem.”
Comment left on another blog regarding the evils of management consultants.
“A life not lived is not worth blogging about.”
Originally written here, this quote is a flagrant rip off of Socrates quote, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” Thus proving both that I’m a brainiac and overqualified for blogging. I’m easily worth 2 or 3 times what I make off this blog. And I’m not going to explain why that last sentence is funny. The crux here is if you don’t do anything but blog, you probably don’t have anything to say. Blogs about being uninspired, or posts apologizing for not writing anything were the sandy bit of irritation that lead me to create this pearl of wisdom.
“You’re selling you in every interview.” – From 5 Tips For I.T. Recruiters
“Don’t sweat it, smoke it.” – From No, It Wasn’t As Good For Me As It Was For You
When life gives you lemons, chuck ‘em and light up a cigar.