Solution To Iraq War Up For Sale On eBay

Heed the sage words of Brian!Well now it’s confirmed. You can buy anything on eBay. Anything! I just learned that a U.S. Army Intelligence Officer has put up the solution to the war in Iraq up for auction on the ‘Bay. But if you want the solution to the Iraq war, you better have some deep pockets. Or better yet a deep couple of brief cases, full of hundred dollar bills. Because it’ll cost you a dollar under $100 million. (I know it sounds like I’m building up to a MasterCard commercial spoof here, but I swear I’m resisting the temptation!)

I’ll bet all those bidders are sorry they didn’t spring for the $1 million Buy-It-Now price tag when the auction first went up! Talk about over-bidding! It’s a shame that they’re hiding the bidder’s ID’s. It’d be pretty interesting to know who’s doing the bidding. 😈

One other thought, do you suppose Officer Thad Krasnesky will waive the $1.25 shipping fee? Or maybe throw in free shipping insurance? If it gets much higher, he may be able to fund his own troop surge! 😉

[UPDATE: D’Oh! It looks like eBay doesn’t have a sense of humor! Or practical business sense for that matter. They’ve taken down the auction! Just think of the hefty chunk of change of a sales fee they’re missing out on! Sorry guys, I guess this is now a non-story. 😦 ]

[UPDATE 2: Those of you who didn’t get see it before it was taken down are in luck! I still had a window open showing the auction.  Here, for your viewing pleasure, was the going rate for an Iraq war solution as it was right around the time I wrote this:

Solution To Iraq War Up For Sale On eBay]

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  1. babychaos said,

    July 17, 2007 at 8:47 am

    Boo! Boring, boring Ebay! It sounds a bit like that leather trousers sale, did you ever see that? It was very funny…

    I’ve tagged you by the way (see my blog for details) you don’t have to say anything but what you do…



  2. Brian said,

    July 17, 2007 at 10:47 am

    Hi BC,

    Yeah, Seriously! If people really wanted to know what the guy had to say and were willing to pay a cool hundred mil (48,906,340.74 Pounds), why not let it go forward? Let the seller deal with the consequences of deal! He’d definitely have the funds to cover the legal costs! 🙂

    Ah yes, I saw that. I’m thinking about what to write in response… 😉


  3. July 18, 2007 at 12:12 am

    I’m intrigued by the bullshit and the nerve of some of these people. Why didn’t I think of this first?

    I guess then, even I could charge a ton of money to the first buyer to convey how to stop all fighting….just don’t do it.

    That’ll be one million dollars, please.

    Great writing, as always Brian!

  4. abarclay12 said,

    July 18, 2007 at 7:10 pm

    I can’t believe they closed the auction. I was raising money to bid. Damnit all.

  5. Brian said,

    July 18, 2007 at 9:10 pm

    Thanks Laurie! I was thinking about selling my own Iraq war exit strategy. Hell, I’ll settle for half a million. Talk about a steal!

    Yeah, abarclay12, I’m disappointed too. I would have like to know if it was going to break a hundred million. I was thinking about bidding myself, and then when I won the auction, I would have pretended to be a parent with a misbehaved child. “I’m sorry, little Johnny got into my account.” It would have been so worth the negative feedback.

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